Is Alabama Throwing the Baby Out With the Bathwater?

In areas where indoor plumbing was not available, one might throw used washing-water out a window onto the street, or dump it out elsewhere. From that developed an idiom in the 1500s, “don’t throw the baby out with the bathwater,” or reworded slightly in the 1800s “[Y]ou must empty-out the bathing-tub, but not the baby along with it,” to figuratively recommend avoid discarding valuables in your fervor to discard non-valuables.

Years ago I amended it —
“Don’t throw the baby out with the bathwater, but also don’t avoid throwing out the bathwater for fear of throwing out babies.”

With discussion of the Alabama total-ban on abortion of any kind, I may need to amend it further, with, “nor, summarize your having thrown out both baby and bathwater, as exercising your right to throw out bathwater.”

In regard to the Alabama law, I think those in favor of a total ban are of so fearful of baby getting thrown out, they would criminalize even just the simple throwing out bathwater on the off-chance it might contain a baby, and will square-peg-into-round-hole force off-topic, vaguely-water-related Chinese proverbs actually about poultry to instead now foretell prophecy of rivers of blood and condemnation that God will rain down upon our once-glorious and sacred nation, neither having been glorious or sacred prior.

Those opposed, however, seem to take immense joy upon filling basins with bathwater and babies, dumping the bathwater with one hand, whilst waving the banner, “my basin, my water” with the other. Even if baby gets dumped out, these argue the bathwater wouldn’t need to be dumped out had we not been enslaved by oppressive capitalist Big Baby, despite themselves being leading shareholders of Big Basin, Big Water, Big Dump, Big Soap, and have pending patents for hydraulic dumping arms, the proceeds for which go to non-profit People For the Ethical Dumping of Oppressive Bathwater.

I recommend not even engaging in behaviors that could lead to babies.

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